30 April

Today wasn’t bad at all.

I did something new with friends.. that was fun and unusual… a bit rebellious too if I may say.IMAG0018IMAG0037[1]IMAG0039[1]

I was only annoyed because of two things.. make them three.

  1. My friend who’s on trial got sentenced to 14 more days in detention. So unfair but happens to a lot of people nowadays.
  2. They keep sending me stuff wanting me to work on my vacation as it’s “top urgent”.. even when it’s not.
  3. I keep checking twitter hoping for something hopeful. Wondering if I still matter at all.

I realize that with all the fun I had today, I still cannot distract myself enough. The healing process is going to take some time. I’ll just have to continue to go through it and “endure”.

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Hugging my little sibling got me calmer…

So how to put this delicately?

This new blog is dedicated to the current me. The inconfident, lost, grumpy, whiny girl who cannot grasp how fast she changed. Sometimes I ask myself if the 18 year old version of me would love the new version or not. I do not think she’ll be impressed by me at the moment honestly. But this blog’s objective is to document the phase when I’m taking more steps in trying to regain myself, my passion, my love, and my capacity for empathy and for caring for people.

I’ll gain it back. Just one step at a time.